By: Virginie Boone

When Catherine O’Hara died, we lost not only a tremendous actress, comedian and human, but also the greatest fictional wine pitchwoman in history, Moira Rose, the indelible matriarch of television’s Schitt’s Creek.

In the series, Moira Rose is a former soap opera star who is always up for making a dramatic turn. She’s all in when asked to be the brand ambassador on a TV commercial for Herb Ertlinger Winery’s fruit wine in an episode called “Wine and Roses.”

It doesn’t go well at first as she panics, requires more takes, rambles drunkenly, then hides in her trailer until her husband talks her off the ledge, sobers her up and she manages one good take for the wine, sort of:

“In the lea of a picturesque ridge lies a small unpretentious winery, one that pampers its fruit like its own babies. Hi, I’m Moira Rose, and if you love fruit wine as much as I do, then you’ll appreciate the craftsmanship and quality of a local vintner who brings the muskmelon goodness to his oak Chardonnay, and the dazzling peach crabapple to his Riesling Rioja. Come taste the difference good fruit can make in your wine. You’ll remember the experience. And you’ll remember the name – Herb Erfling … ger. Burt Herngeif. Irv Herm-blinger. Bing Livehaanger. Live Link. Burt Herkern. Burn- Agh! Bingo Lingf***er.”

Not every wine ad can be so amusing. But over the years, there have been some dramatic and effective winery commercials that have tried to tell the story of wine.

One of the most famous involved an actor/director of the 1940s and 1950s named Orson Welles. While younger generations may not know him or his work, his tagline has permeated popular culture forever – “We will sell no wine before its time.”

The slogan was from ubiquitous print and television commercials for Paul Masson Winery that ran from 1978 to 1981, oft parodied since. The first aired was for a Masson Emerald Dry White Table Wine set to the tune of Beethoven’s Symphony No. 5 in the winery’s effort to rebrand itself as a higher-end producer than it was thought of at the time. The script used the symphony as inspiration, Welles saying:

“It took Beethoven four years to write that symphony. Some things can’t be rushed: good music, and good wine… What Paul Masson himself said nearly a century ago is still true today: We will sell no wine before its time.”

Later ads sold Paul Masson Rhine Castle Riesling, California Champagne, Chablis, Burgundy, and a carafe-shaped bottle with jam-jar top. Print ads were for Pinot, Chardonnay and Cabernet Sauvignon, reflecting the era’s common naming of wines for French regions and not always varieties.

Welles was paid $500,000 a year to make the ads, plus residuals. A large man of significant appetite, Welles enjoyed elaborate lunches prepared for his enjoyment before filming where he was said to also drink plenty of Paul Masson Cabernet. The money and trouble were worth it, though – sales of Paul Masson rose 30% during the campaign.

When combative, drunken outtakes were released later showing Welles as compromised as Moira Rose, the parodied nature of the ads became even funnier. Welles was eventually fired and replaced by British actor John Gielgud.

Gallo produced what many believe to be one of the best TV wine commercials of all time, debuted in 1986 in which scenes of weddings and other celebrations are shown along with bottles of wine as dramatic music plays and a voiceover says “To dreams and hopes and promises and years of happy days. Today’s Gallo: All the best a wine can be.”

These days, TV wine ads are rare, and pack less of a punch, given the disparate way people watch things across various platforms, social media and streaming services.

Brands like Barefoot (the Official Wine Sponsor of the NFL), Stella Rosa, Avaline, and Sutter Home have tried. Closer to home, Decoy Wines Cabernet Sauvignon and Sauvignon Blanc have been featured in a recent ad campaign called “Making New Connections,” part of a larger messaging around the slogan, “Pour to What’s Possible.” Sonoma County-based La Crema Winery launched a 30-second TV ad called “Best of Summer” in 2024.

Advertising can be art, it can move people emotionally, same as wine. Until the next memorable wine ad comes along, raise a glass to the late, great Moira Rose and taste “the difference good fruit can make in your wine.”

Photo By: IMDB